She's Alive?
by Abbi4Raie
Summary: What would happen if Kate truned out alive?
1. When She Turns Up

It was a normal day at the NCIS Headquarters. Tony and Ziva were bickering over the littlest things, like whose apartment they were going to spend the night at, or why Ziva's panties were in Tony's desk drawer. McGee was in Abby's lab. Gibbs was somewhere drinking coffee. Ducky was talking to a corpse.

Actually, both Tony and Ziva wanted to spend the night at Ziva's, but Tony was bored. Bickering with Ziva was something to do, so he said he wanted to spend the night at his place.

Neither of them knew exactly why her panties were in his drawer. Ziva said Tony stole them and brought them in. Tony said Ziva snuck them in there.

That's what they were talking about when Abby and McGee entered the bullpen.

"I did not put my panties in your desk, Tony," Ziva said.

"I didn't take them. And if I did put them in here, it would be the red ones, not these," Tony said, holding them up.

They heard chuckling and McGee said, "Those are _yours_?" They hadn't noticed McGee or Abby before that.

Tony quickly shoved the panties in his drawer. "Go away McPeeker. You too, Abby."

"Mc_Peeker? _You held it up in plain sight," McGee said, sitting at his desk.

"McJealous," Tony mumbled.

"He is not jealous," Abby said, leaning over McGee's shoulder to stare at the computer screen.

Tony sent Ziva a questioning look but she just shrugged in response.

"Aww, he's so cute," Abby cooed

"You want that one?" McGee asked and Abby nodded.

This time, Ziva sent the questioning look and Tony shrugged.

After a minute of doing nothing, Tony decided he was still bored. He found a piece of paper, crumpled it into a ball, and threw it at Ziva. She was looking at her computer screen so she didn't notice until it hit her head. She glared at him but went back to looking at her screen. Tony threw another at her, again hitting her head.

"Do you want me to do the Bobbitt tonight?" Ziva said.

Tony grimaced and shook his head. Out of the corner of her eye, Ziva could see McGee grimace, too.

The elevator door dinged. Assuming it was Gibbs, they all pretended they were busy.

As the person got closer, they heard the clicking of heels. It couldn't be Gibbs.

The clicking stopped. Ziva was the first to look up. Well, it was a woman. A beautiful brunette.

Then Tony looked up. Ziva could clearly see the confusion on his face. When McGee and Abby looked up, they had looks identical to Tony's.

The woman turned to Ziva. "I'm Caitlin Todd."


	2. Her New History

_Caitlin Todd. Former NCIS Agent. Killed by Ziva's brother. Replaced by Ziva._

That just made Tony, McGee and Abby more confused. And it made Ziva get confused. At first, it was just a woman to Ziva, but then it was a dead woman. It couldn't be possible.

"And you are...?" Kate prompted.

"Ziva David."

Kate turned to Abby. "I missed you Abby."

Abby didn't know what to do so she just stared at Kate.

"Okay then. You must all be extremely confused. But I can explain." "Campfire," Tony called, dragging his chair to the centre of the bullpen. Ziva and McGee groaned, but done the same. Abby walked over and stood by McGee. "Grab Gibbs' chair," he said to Kate.

After Kate had done so, Tony said, "Explain" "I was put in a witness protection program. To this day, I do not know why. One night, they took me from my home, not giving me a chance to explain. But they didn't want anyone getting suspicious about my disappearance so they sent in my cousin,, who looks a _lot_ like me. It just happened to be around the time that Ari came along, and he killed her, thinking she was me. That made it a lot easier for everyone. You wouldn't get suspicious if she started acting like someone other than me," Kate explained.

"But wouldn't people get suspicious when your cousin disappeared?" Ziva said.

"No. She lived in the middle of nowhere, nobody but herself to keep her company," Kate said.

"Why are you back here?" Tony asked.

"They said I didn't need protection anymore and let me go. The only place I knew to go was here," Kate replied.

"Why here? There are many other place you could have gone," Abby said.

"It's the only place where I trusted people to keep me safe. And I really missed you guys" Kate said.

Ziva felt left out because she had never known Kate.

_"_What about the others here, the ones trained to kill, the oneswhose brother supposedly killed you?" she asked.

"I didn't know who my replacement was. But I knew that Icould trust you because you are on this team," Kate said.

"How did you know none of us left?" McGee asked.

_"_I didn't. But I had one of Gibbs' gut feelings that told me you were still here," Kate answered.

That was when the elevator dinged.

Nobody really noticed it, though. They were too wrapped up in their conversation with the not-dead Kate.

They never noticed until Gibbs spoke. "Ziver, I-" but he stopped dead in his tracks when he saw Kate. "Who the hell is this?"

"It's Kate, boss. She's not dead," Tony said.

"Kate who?" Gibbs couldn't think of it being her.

"Todd. Caitlin Todd."


	3. Gibbs' Reaction

**I actually had this chapter wrote since Saturday night, the day I posted chapter 2, but I didn't get a chance to post it then, and yesterday I spent the entire day _reading_ fanfiction so here it is.**

**

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**

Turns out, Gibbs and his team think a lot alike. When Kate had finished telling him her story, he asked a lot of questions very similar to those of his team. He trained them well.

But he did have more questions to add.

"Why the hell didn't you tell me?" Gibbs sounded. angry.

"I couldn't. It could've gotten me, or you, or anyone else I care about killed. And you thought I was dead anyway."

"Why didn't you tell me before your visit?"

"I wanted to surprise you. And I knew you would've recognised me better in person than over the phone."

"Was it you when Tony was in the hospital?"

"Yes. They took me shortly after that."

After a while, Gibbs left to get coffee. He was still angry, even though he understood her reasons.

Abby and McGee went back to the lab, Tony and Ziva back to their desks. They told Kate she could stick around for a little while, and told her to sit at McGee's desk. She took out a drawing pad and started drawing.

An email popped up on Tony's computer screen. It was from Ziva saying '_I want my panties back._' Tony grinned devilishly. He then proceeded to take them out of his desk and throw them at her. She wasn't expecting it, and he threw them a little high, so it flew over to where the next squad was.

"I didn't mean now," Ziva yelled, blushing at the thought of another team seeing her panties that even her own squad hated.

"You asked for it."

"You drive me up the hall, Tony."

"Wall, like I told you a million times before."

"Whatever."

Kate smiled inwardly at the bickering couple. It was nice to know Tony had found someone to love.

"I think these are yours," someone called, and the panties flew back over.

"Thanks," Ziva mumbled, this time putting the panties in _her own _desk.

It took days for Gibbs to stop fuming about Kate. When he did, though, he had an excellent idea.

After talking to the director , he found Kate. That day, she was visiting Abby, wearing a guest tag.

"We need to talk," he told her, leading her out of the lab.

"Do you want me to stop visiting?"

"No, Kate, I want you to join my team."

"But you have a full, perfectly healthy team."

"I talked to the director. He said it might be good if we had another member."

"Would I have to go out in the field?"

"Not if you don't want to."

"I don't. Unless you need me. But only then."

"Now that that's settled..."

"Where would I sit?"

"Next to McGee."

"So I'll practically be isolated."

"Well, kinda."

"It's fine, Gibbs. I've been isolated for such a long time that I kind of prefer it."

"Okay. What was your identity when you were in protection...if you had a different one?"

"Lily Tarra. Birthday June 5. Former jobs were a store clerk and a waitress." Kate continued listing every other aspect of her former identity.

"Well then lets hook you up with a new one."

When Kate got her new identity, she liked it way more than her old one. She was now Kate Minsce, born February 24. She had a bunch of degrees and such, making it possible for her to work at NCIS.

It was just the matter of surviving the people who had thought she was dead that she had to worry about.

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**So, who likes the idea of re-adding Kate to the team? Which of her three identities do you like best?**


	4. Scrabble

"Stop stealing my stuff," Ziva was shouting when Kate and Gibbs entered the bullpen.

"I did not steal it. I found it in here," Tony shouted back.

Ziva started shouting in a foreign language-Hebrew, Tony guessed. He tried to tune her out, focusing on his computer screen. But then he noticed something. It was Kate. She was no longer wearing the required guest tag. That confused him. Guests wore guest tags, no exception. The confusion caused Tony to stare, trying to figure it out.

Kate noticed. She walked over to the front of his desk. She stuck her hand at him and said, "Kate Minsce, NCIS agent."

Tony didn't know what to do. Should he shake her hand? Should he ask questions? Should he get pissed, or be happy? Should he wonder what was going on? He ended up just sitting there, dumbfounded.

Kate let her hand drop. "Hmm, maybe I should explain," she said before walking over to a desk in the next cubicle and sitting down.

"Timmy," Abby called. They were having a game of Scrabble and Abby wanted to win.

McGee then proceeded to lay down a 15-pointer. Abby slapped him hard on the head. Then, after a moment of pondering, she added her 15-pointer. McGee then slapped her head and put another 15-pointer. Abby punched his arm, looked at her letters, punched his arm again, and laid down a 7-pointer.

The game went on like that. Slapping, punching, kicking, biting, clawing. McGee looked like he was attacked by a savage beast. There were a lot of high-pointers, with the occasional low-pointer. Eventually, McGee won.

"Haha," McGee boasted, jumping to his feet.

"I'm going to get you for this," Abby said and jumped up.

McGee started running around the lab, Abby chasing him. McGee kept pushing things in Abby's way so she would trip over them. She missed most, but tripped over a few, one landing her right in McGee's arms. She sunk deeper in those arms, those protecting arms. She could stay there forever.

Abby's phone rang. She answered it, McGee keeping his arms around her. It was Gibbs telling them to go up to the bullpen.

Abby sighed. She didn't want to leave McGee's arms, but she knew she must. Gibbs would kill her, his favorite, for breaking rule twelve. And he would Gibbs-slap McGee into the next century. He already did with Tony and Ziva.

When they entered the bullpen, Ziva gasped. "What happened, McGee?"

"Scrabble," came his reply. Abby had forgotten about that.

Ziva looked confused, but let it drop.

When they were all comfortable, Gibbs and Kate started telling the story of Kate Minsce, and how she was part of the team.

"So now we're team Gibbs, past and present," Tony said.

"And future," Ziva added.

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**Who can guess what Ziva means by 'and future'? Hm? Do you like the scrabble game?**


	5. Honey Dust and Hormones

**OMG, I'm soooo sorry for the really long wait. I'm not dead! It was only my muse that was dead. **  
**Last night, I watched the episode SWAK. When I went to bed, I was still thinking about the episode. All of a sudden, and idea popped in my head. Then, I was remembering an NCIS youtube video I watched, like, a few weeks ago, and I got another idea. So, the chapter is two scenes, but for some reason, it turned out really short.**  
**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: Nope, I don't own NCIS. Goddess, these disclaimers are boring.**

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Everyone was sitting at their desks, working on paperwork. Everyone except Kate.

Actually, they were pretending to do paperwork. McGee was playing an online RPG. Abby was down in her lab, playing the same game. Even Ziva was playing it. Nobody knew her online identity, even though it was pretty obvious. Tony, who never thought Ziva would actually do that, was in an online contest. The winner was the one who looked the most bored. Gibbs, just to annoy Tony, voted 'no' every time.

Abby, aka PrincessBlack, was protected by her warrior, NCISman. Occasionally, he needed a little help, and that's when AssassinChick shows up. She was one of the strongest warriors in the land, so whenever someone needed help, she was there.

AssassinChick was walking around, waiting to be needed, when Kate walked in to the bullpen. She laid a small box on Tony's desk.

"What's this?"

"Honey Dust. For Ziva." She reached into her pocket, pulling something out. "And a feather."

Gibbs chuckled, remembering the conversation of seven years earlier.

"Gee, thanks," Tony mumbled, hiding his excitement of applying the powder to the Israeli beauty.

"My pleasure. This time, just don't get the plague."

"I won't. You can count on that."

"I only can if I can trust you not to open any mysterious SWAK letters."

The two did indeed use the Honey Dust that night. And the feather. Ziva kicked Tony a few times, when it would tickle.

The Honey Dust, added to the natural taste of Ziva, was Tony's new favourite flavour. He never knew anything could be so sweet, a good sweet.

Ziva had always loved the feel of his tongue running along her body. She was thankful for Kate, giving Tony another excuse to use his tongue all over her.

A few days later, Ziva was not in a good mood, and she was making it noticed.

"Did you wake up on the wrong side of the bed, Zi?"

"No." She slammed a drawer after putting a knife inside. "You were there."

"It's a figure of speech. It means-"

Ziva glared at him, telling him to shut up.

She continued the day like that. Slamming drawers, glaring at everybody who tried to speak to her, slamming the phone down, being rough in any way. She even glared at Abby.

At one point, Tony stood up on his desk to make an announcement. Being Tony, he had to make a joke with it.

"All hail thee, people of Arabia," he said in a deep voice. When he had the entire office's attention, he continued. "Do not talk to Ziva, unless you want to die."

When Tony jumped off his desk, he was given the worst ever death glare by said murderous female.

Later, Ziva got up and made her way to the copy machine. Halfway through, it jammed. Being in a bad mood, she kicked it her hardest. Nothing happened. She took the already finished copies back to her desk.

"That time of month?" Tony teased.

"As a matter of fact, no. Not for another little while."

"How long is a 'little while'?"

"A few months."

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**Leave a review! What parts did you like? Dislike? Anything!**


	6. Congratulations Are In Order

**I decided I would start writing longer chapters, and then I got a perfect idea. But then I realised that perfect idea would work better as two chapter. So I ended up writing short chapters for it. But because of that, I am giving you two chapters in one day!**

**Disclaimer: Nope, I don't own NCIS. Just the first 7 seasons on DVD.**

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The days passed, and eventually the team got a case.

"Gear up. We have an escapee from Bethesda."

As they were headed out, Ziva noticed Kate wasn't tagging along. She slowed down, hanging back from the group, but when she heard a shout of "David!" escape Gibbs' lips, she knew there was a reason. She would figure it out when they got back.

After investigating the room the Petty Officer had stayed in, the team headed out in search of him. It didn't take long to find him.

He was outside, hidden in a bush, too injured to go on. It was easy to get him back to his room, as he was too injured to fight.

The drive back to Headquarters was normal, except Tony seemed to be unfocused, deep in thought.

All of a sudden, he stated, "I got it! I know what you meant!" Ziva was confused.

"You're pregnant!" Tony blurted.

"W-what?" McGee stammered.

"Is this true, Ziver?" Gibbs asked, father-like.

Ziva was afraid of disappointing her 'father', but she knew he would catch her if she lied. "Yes."

"Congratulations," Gibbs said, meaning it, leaving the vehicle in a shocked silence.

Not another word was said until the four were seated at their desks and Kate said, "Gibbs, I have something to tell you."

He led the way to his 'conference room', allowing them to speak in private.

"I wonder what that's about," Tony said.

Ziva nodded, then noticed McGee was staring at her. "What?" she asked angrily.

"Nothing. Just trying to picture you pregnant."

Ziva grumbled something incoherent.

Then a man leaned over the divider. "Ma'am, can you hold this baby for me while I go to the restroom? I'll be quick."

"Okay," she said, deciding to start getting used to the idea.

When Gibbs and Kate re-entered the bullpen, Kate had a look of shock on her face, while Gibbs had a huge grin.

"Two out of three," he announced, before he saw the baby in Ziva's arms. His face became engulfed in confusion, and he asked, "How long have we been in there?"

"Two out of three, boss?" Tony was confused.

Gibbs looked toward Kate, who gave him a look that said 'go ahead, tell them.'

"Kate's pregnant," he said.

Thirty seconds later, the same man walked through the bullpen, right up to Ziva's desk. "Thanks," he said, taking the baby. He rounded the divider.

McGee's phone chose that moment to ring. When he answered it, Ziva could clearly hear Abby's voice saying, "_Timmy! Get down here! I have something to tell you!_"

McGee automatically headed down to the lab.

"I wonder what that's about," Tony repeated his earlier statement.

"I guess we will find out later," Ziva said, then caught Kate watching her.'

"I never knew you for long, but I think you will be a great mother."

"You also."

When McGee came back ten minutes later, he had the biggest possible smile on his face. "Three out of three."

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**Did you like it? Please review!**


	7. Secrets Revealed

**And the next chapter! I still don't own NCIS, by the way.**

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When they were finally alone, in the woman's restroom, of course, Ziva asked Kate, "Why did you not join us in the field earlier today?"

Kate looked like she was having an internal battle over what to say. Finally, she sighed and went with the truth. "Gibbs and I have an idea that I don't have to unless I'm needed."

"Why? Do you not want to?"

She sighed again. "Being in the field is what put me in the Witness Protection Program. When I was in the field, I saw something I should not have. The guy came after me, but the investigators needed me alive. I don't want that to happen again."

"Why did you tell us you did not know why you were put in the program?"

"I don't know. I guess I was afraid."

Their conversation went on, and eventually it reached a turning point.

"I think Tabitha is a cute name," Kate said.

"Tabitha? I prefer something like Jane."

"Jane is too much like Kate."

"Tabitha is like a horrible version of Talia."

"What do you think of Tiffany?"

"I like it, but it sounds like a hooker."

"Tina?"

"Are you obsessed with t's?"

"No. What boy's names do you like?"

"Wyatt."

"Ew, no. Jacob."

"Jared."

"Ethen."

The two girls spoke about many names they liked and disliked. They spoke about many things to do with their soon-to-be children.

They decided that when it was a few months away from their due dates, they would get Abby and the three woman would go shopping for their babies.

Eventually, they got to the topic of fathers.

"Yours is obviously Tony."

"Yes. Abby's has to be Tim."

"For sure."

"Who is yours? Do I know him?"

"Yes, you know him." Kate sounded nervous.

"Who is he?"

"Um, Gibbs," she finally revealed.

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**Please review!**


	8. Morning Sickness

**First, sorry for the long wait and the fact that the chapter is really short. Second, I know some parts are pretty cheesy and stuff. Third, I searched up the morning sickness part before writing it.**

**Disclaimer: I wish I owned NCIS, but I would probably ruin it.**

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"Zee, do you want a boy or a girl?" Tony asked when they were lying in bed on a lazy Sunday morning.

"I do not car. As long as they are healthy."

"I always thought you would prefer a girl; you know, a mini Ziva."

"A mini Ziva? I would prefer a mini Tony. But I still do not care."

Tony chuckled. "I want a mini Ziva."

"I thought you'd want a boy. A little womanizer."

"Nope. I want a maneater." He grinned.

Ziva's face clouded over with confusion. She tried to hide it, nodding slightly, but Tony knew her well.

"It's like a womanizer, but it's a woman instead of a man."

The Israeli's face clearly said 'oh'.

"Like you."

She punched him in the chest, feigning victory when she heard a little "oomph."

"I'm not one anymore."

"Correct."

"I just hope that thing ended where everyone you loved died. I don't want to be stuck in the ground for the rest of eternity."

Ziva laughed, but never said anything for awhile. Eventually she said, thoughtfully, "Maybe they all died to lead me to you."

"Yeah, maybe."

xxx

Tony, his arms around Ziva. They lay like that for awhile, finding comfort in each other's presence.

Tony, his curiosity getting the better of him, spoke up, after about a half hour. "What does morning sickness feel like?"

"I would not know."

"Why not?"

"I haven't felt it." She loved not vomiting every day. "Before you ask, I researched it. Fifteen percent of women do not get morning sickness. And there is still a possibility that I will."

"Oh. Okay."

Fifteen minutes later, Ziva was asleep, ear pressed against Tony's beating heart. He softly stroked her wild curly hair, trying not to wake her.

She turned her head down a bit, and some of her hair went in his mouth. He spit his hair out and started to wipe his tongue crazily.

The motion woke Ziva. "Tony?"

"Hmm?"

"What are you doing?"

"Your hair. In my mouth."

"Why?"

"You moved your head."

"Oh, really?" She flicked her head again, resulting in more hair in his mouth.

Tony flipped the two over, pinning Ziva to the bed.

As of that, a wrestling match started.

They would flip each other over, pin each other down, anything they could think of. But neither would surrender.

At one point, Tony pinned to the bed, Ziva leaned down and kissed him. After that, it turned to sex, passionate sex, that the couple enjoying immensely.

Afterwards, the two held each other, never wanting to let go, but knowing they would have to eventually.

They never knew how close that would be.

xxx

A cellphone rang, and Ziva reached over Tony to grab it off the night table.

"David."

"Since when do you answer DiNozzo's cell? Gibbs asked.

"He's asleep."

"Wake him up. We got a case."

She listened to him tell her the address before he hung up.

"Wake up, my little hairy butt," she said, shaking Tony.

"What?" he said, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes.

"We have a case. I am going to get a shower."

"I'll join you." When he saw the look she gave him, he added, "It'll be quicker."

After their shower, of which all Ziva would allow them to do was wash each other, they enjoyed the quick meal Ziva cooked. Then she grabbed her keys as they headed to her car.

She drove her normal crazy speed, ignoring Tony's comments, which were mostly urgent "watch out"'s.

Well, until he said, "Are you trying to get me, you, and that little thing growing inside of you, killed?"

She decreased her speed, barely, even though Gibbs was going to be pissed at them for taking so long. "Happy?"

When they made it to the scene, Gibbs briefed them on what he and McGee already knew.

"Where's Kate, Boss?" Tony asked.

"Stayed home. Too sick."

Tony turned to Ziva. "You're one lucky chick."

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**Please review!**


	9. You've Been Warned

**New chapter! I know it's a bit short, but the next chapter will be up soon, because I already have it written.**

**Disclaimer: Don't own. Yadda yadda yadda. I do have cookies though :D**

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"I will kill you, Tony! I am serious!" Ziva shouted across the bullpen.

"Ooh, DiNozzo. I would be more careful if I were you." Kate teased. "Maybe you should've thought before getting an ex-mossad-assassin pregnant. Or before you started throwing things at said woman."

"It's not my fault," Tony pouted. "My sperm are like Mexicans. No matter how many borders you put up, they still keep getting in."

Kate rolled her eyes at that. "And you're a suicidal bastard."

All of a sudden, there was a bang from Ziva hitting her hand against her computer monitor.

"Fix this, McGee!"

"Uh - umm - fix what?" he stammered.

"This stupid machine," she grumbled, slamming her hand against the monitor once again.

McGee quickly jumped up from his chair and rushed over to Ziva's desk. She sat there, glaring at the screen, while he tried to figure out what was wrong.

"She sure is one grumpy pregnant lady," Tony stated.

The sound of Gibbs' hand colliding with the back of Tony's head resonated throughout the entire squadroom, causing a few people to wince.

"Are you suicidal, DiNozzo?"

"Oh, he is," Kate piped up.

"Seriously, boss? You have to show up now, and not while she is shouting death threats at me and physically assaulting her computer monitor?"

"Don't worry, DiNozzo. It gets worse."

He set his coffee on his desk and sat, leaving behind a wide-eyed Tony. He smirked, but the only person who noticed was Kate.

The way to tell that Abby is coming? The clunking of her boots. How to tell her mood? How forceful the clunking is.

That's how the team could tell that Abby wasn't happy, but she wasn't really angry either, before they even saw her.

The clunking was a little more forceful than usual, but not enough to mean they had to prepare for the wrath of Abby.

That was proven when she finally made it into their section.

She marched right up to Tony and slapped him on the back of the head. "That was for annoying Ziva." She then went to McGee and slapped the back of his head. "That was for not fixing her computer fast enough." She slapped him again. "And that was for getting me pregnant and making me feel like shit!"

"Ooh, McGee getting more slaps than Tony," Kate said.

Ziva chuckled at that.

Everybody watched as Abby stalked out. She came back mere seconds later, grinning, and said, "That felt good. Maybe I should do it more often."

"No!" the men shouted all at once, Tony and McGee the loudest.

Abby was terrifying. Almost as much as Ziva.

Ziva was sitting on Tony's desk, conversing with him, the other men doing something at their own computers, when a pissed-off looking Kate walked into the bullpen.

"Oh, God, no, not you, too," Tony whimpered.

She glared at him, telling him to shut up with her eyes, then went to her desk and sat down.

Tony shrugged and continued talking with Ziva. But after a few minutes, he started hearing quiet sobbing coming from Kate's direction. He stood and walked over to her desk. Tears were streaming down her face.

"Are you _crying_?"

"Look at this."

He looked at the computer screen and saw a short article about animal abuse, telling you to stop it.

"Yeah, so?"

"How can you say that? These poor animals are being tortured!" Kate sobbed. "What sick bastard does something like that? It needs to stop."

"Okaaay," Tony slowly backed away, then turned and ran to his desk. "Why did I do that?" he muttered.

"Because you're suicidal," Ziva giggled.

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Please review!


	10. A Disturbing Discovery

**Here is the next chapter. It will be the last I post until at least next Saturday, because I will be gone away. But I will still read, and try to write!**

**Disclaimer: Just this story proves I don't own it.**

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"You know what? Get out!" Ziva shouted.

Ever since Ziva had gotten pregnant, she tended to be a bit angrier than usual. Her and Tony would fight about the stupidest things because, as usual, he was the suicidal idiot that would actually participate. He should just let Ziva yell at him and be done with it, but no. He _had _to yell back.

Like when she got mad at Tony for putting a knife in the wrong place, and he said that it used to always go there, and she said that she changed it since he was last there. That fight resulted in a knife stuck in Ziva's kitchen wall.

Or the time when Tony forgot to put the toilet seat down, and she fell in. Ziva had come out soaking wet, and he laughed, making her angrier than she already was.

Or when she yelled at him for his cold feet when they were in bed. He said that he couldn't help it, she said that he could put some socks on, and he said that he didn't complain when she stuck her cold feet on him. He ended up sleeping on the couch.

But she had never kicked him out of her apartment. That is, until this stupid fight that Tony couldn't even remember what it was about.

He left Ziva's apartment, taking only his cell phone and wallet, with the intention of heading back to his place. But as he drove he thought of asking Gibbs for some advice, and unconsciously made his way toward said man's house. He didn't realise until he turned off his engine and found himself sitting in Gibbs' driveway.

Well if he was there, he might as well do it.

Tony climbed out of the car and walked to the door, opening it without knocking. Inside, he decided that since Gibbs wasn't on the couch, he was probably in the basement working on his boat.

Tony opened the door to the basement and descended the stairs.

What he saw - and heard - would haunt him forever.

Gibbs was certainly down there. But he wasn't working on his boat. And he was _not_ alone.

First, Gibbs was naked. Which is gross. Imagine walking in on your sixty-something-year-old father, completely and utterly naked.

And he was having sex with a woman. Not just any woman, either. It was Kate, whom Tony considered as a sister. Yes, she's hot, but who wants to see their sister naked? And the age difference between the two was just gross.

Finally, the object they were having sex on top of was an unfinished boat.

"Oh, that is just gross."

They noticed him then. Kate's eyes were almost as wide as saucers, and Gibbs stayed on top of her, seemingly trying to cover them both.

"I have a few things to say. First, couldn't that boat give you splinters? Second, I am never touching that thing again." Tony shuddered. "And third, you should probably lock your door."

"What do you want, DiNozzo?" Gibbs grumbled.

"Um, nothing anymore." He sprinted out of the house, and sped all the way home.

When Tim walked in to the bullpen, he saw Tony sitting at his desk with his head in his hands. He just _had _to know why.

"You want to know why, McPester? Here's why. I walked in on Gibbs having sex last night."

"So? Was she hot?" This statement made McGee sound a lot like Tony, but hi didn't seem to notice.

"I would hope so," Kate said as she walked in, and winked at Tony.

"Uhh, what was that about?" Tim wanted to know.

"Because, McGee, it was Kate!" Tony shouted.

McGee's eyes practically bulged out of their sockets. He stood there for a moment, picturing it, then shuddered.

"I shouldn't have asked," he said.

"Shouldn't have asked what, McGee?" Ziva asked, walking in and sitting at her desk.

"Last night, Tony walked in on Gibbs and I having sex."

Ziva chuckled. "Is that what happened after I kicked you out?"

"I hate you for that," Tony grumbled.

"I guess the lesson has been learned."

"Never piss off a pregnant woman, "Gibbs said, smiling, as he entered with his coffee in hand.

"I never would have guessed," Tony mumbled.

"What was that, DiNozzo?"

"Nothing, boss. Just, next time, please lock your door." And then, to himself, he mumbled, "I'm never gonna look at those two the same again."

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